In an open letter a young man about ten years my junior,

“I couldn’t hear all of the things that you said under your breath in order for me to hear them. I missed the first word, but the next few were, ‘… and thick, and pretty, and cute.’ I laughed, because I couldn’t help it. You have braces. You may have mistaken the laugh for a giggle. I also think you were talking to a girl on the phone while you were making your sotto voce commentary.”

In an open letter to the wretch that is today,

“I hate you. If there were a slur that could be applied to bad days, I would probably not use it, but I would be tempted to. If I were a smoker, I would have lit up two cigarettes and smoked them both, first the right hand cigarette, then the left hand cigarette. I will neither confirm nor deny spending some time today eating my feelings. You are not welcome around here. Go away forever. Die.”

Getting into a little of a lot of things.