“I am disturbed by how quickly your auto fill mechanism knew that I wanted the word, ‘inappropriate.’”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“I am disturbed by how quickly your auto fill mechanism knew that I wanted the word, ‘inappropriate.’”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[331],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2553","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-Fb","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2809,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/09\/in-an-open-letter-to-netflix-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":2553,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to Netflix,","author":"sherlonya","date":"September 3, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYou suggested that I like \u2018cerebral political documentaries\u2019 as well as \u2018feel-good reality shows.\u2019 While I am disturbed by the number of times the word cerebral has come into my life describing me or my tastes, I am starting to feel like you know me.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2292,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/02\/in-an-open-letter-to-a-piece-of-king-cake-that-made-me-want\/","url_meta":{"origin":2553,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to a piece of king cake that made me want,","author":"sherlonya","date":"February 13, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI probably shouldn\u2019t be telling you this, but as soon as I took that bread knife in hand, I knew that my basest desires would be unleashed. I have never felt this way about a piece of food before, but you made a million Prince songs go through my head,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"cake\"","block_context":{"text":"cake","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/cake\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4340,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2015\/02\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-coworkers-who-were-victims-of-my-eavesdropping\/","url_meta":{"origin":2553,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the apparent coworkers who were victims of my eavesdropping,","author":"sherlonya","date":"February 5, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI know that you are boss and employee. Therefore, the intimacy of that lean-in disturbed me. Deeply. Additionally, I don\u2019t know how to reconcile that whole wedding band issue. I might not sleep soundly tonight.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2443,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-daddy-yankee-pandora-station\/","url_meta":{"origin":2553,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to her Daddy Yankee Pandora station,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 3, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI regret to inform you that I can no longer listen to you at work. You see, there is something about this music that makes my hips move involuntarily. This is inappropriate at best and probably most likely creepy\/downright gross. Additionally, this music both makes me mouth lyrics (not a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2628,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-chicken-in-the-salad-i-recently-mauled\/","url_meta":{"origin":2553,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to the chicken in the salad I recently mauled,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 16, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cIn my hunger, I succumbed to the sweet rush of relief that overtook me as the tines of my pork pushed past your gentle resistance. Inappropriate noises were made.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2438,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-lyndon-johnson\/","url_meta":{"origin":2553,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to Lyndon Johnson,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 2, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI understand that this is probably an inappropriate thing to say to the deceased, but I can totally imagine someone grabbing those \u00a0large ears of yours, whispering into one of them, \u2018Big Texas.\u2019 What have you done to me?\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2553","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2553"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2553\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2554,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2553\/revisions\/2554"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2553"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2553"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2553"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}