“Because of you, I did not take a picture of the hairy, exposed butt crack that was in front of me for an extended period of time. I glanced down at it several times and wondered if the reddish patch on it was red because of scratching, but I didn’t take a picture, despite having two cameras on my person at the time.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“Because of you, I did not take a picture of the hairy, exposed butt crack that was in front of me for an extended period of time. I glanced down at it several times and wondered if the reddish patch on it was red because of scratching, but I didn’t take a picture, despite having […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[331],"tags":[198,471,472,473,474],"class_list":["post-2581","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-open-letters","tag-bodies","tag-bottoms","tag-hairy","tag-pride","tag-self-control","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-FD","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2446,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-cute-guy-she-saw-digging-in-his-butt\/","url_meta":{"origin":2581,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to the cute guy she saw digging in his butt,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 3, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cWhen I saw the confidence with which you used four fingers to scratch your butt deeply. I was sure you were going to smell your fingers. Instead you used that hand to dig in your ear. While you are cute, your pleasant face did not overcome these indiscretions\u2026.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2537,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-bicyclist-who-rode-while-exposing-a-good-three-inches-of-rear-end\/","url_meta":{"origin":2581,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the bicyclist who rode while exposing a good three inches of rear end,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 11, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cSir, it was the exposed buttock region that first got my attention. Then, however, I noticed that the crackside shadows made it look like you were wearing thong panties. So, of course, I had to get a closer look. I didn\u2019t see any underwear at all. This is, of course,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4850,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2016\/12\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-coat-less-woman-who-whizzed-by-me-on-a-scooter-on-a-cold-cold-day\/","url_meta":{"origin":2581,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the coat-less woman who whizzed by me on a scooter on a cold, cold day,","author":"sherlonya","date":"December 19, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cThis seemed like a fashion choice. I\u2019m wondering, though if that 3 inches of exposed upper butt was also a fashion choice. My real question, though, is wasn\u2019t that cold? You had both low temperatures and the wind you created going at that bare skin.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3999,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/11\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-woman-she-watched-pick-her-nose-for-an-extended-period-of-time\/","url_meta":{"origin":2581,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to the woman she watched pick her nose for an extended period of time,","author":"sherlonya","date":"November 4, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI have never seen someone commit to picking her nose the way that you did. As I openly stared at you not bothering to disguise my gaze, you didn\u2019t even acknowledge my presence. I am perplexed by the science behind your nose picking. I couldn\u2019t see any of your pinky\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3909,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/10\/in-an-open-letter-to-a-man-whom-i-watched-close-his-front-door-for-an-extended-period-of-time\/","url_meta":{"origin":2581,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to a man whom I watched close his front door for an extended period of time,","author":"sherlonya","date":"October 23, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI noticed you because of your bright sweat shirt. Then I saw you close your door, and then lock it. Then you pulled at your door handle. Then you jiggled it. Then you repeated the jiggling. Then you tried to turn the handle. Then you jiggled it some more. Then\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5052,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-a-self-who-realized-that-her-tunic-was-caught-in-her-backpack-leaving-her-hind-quarters-kinda-exposed\/","url_meta":{"origin":2581,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to a self who realized that her tunic was caught in her backpack leaving her hind quarters kinda exposed,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 12, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYeah, so the exclaiming at yourself, \u2018Great. Everything\u2019s hanging out now!\u2019 in a somewhat audible tone probably was not the best move.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2581","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2581"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2581\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2581"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2581"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2581"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}