{"id":2665,"date":"2013-07-08T18:54:42","date_gmt":"2013-07-08T23:54:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/openletters\/?p=1723"},"modified":"2013-07-08T18:54:42","modified_gmt":"2013-07-08T23:54:42","slug":"in-an-open-letter-to-the-neighbor-swinging-his-trash-bag-like-a-dandy-might-swing-his-cane","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/07\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-neighbor-swinging-his-trash-bag-like-a-dandy-might-swing-his-cane\/","title":{"rendered":"In an open letter to the neighbor swinging his trash bag like a dandy might swing his cane,"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Dude, you are much braver than I am. I sincerely hope that your garbage doesn&#8217;t wind up on your head.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&ldquo;Dude, you are much braver than I am. I sincerely hope that your garbage doesn&rsquo;t wind up on your head.&rdquo;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[331],"tags":[572,573,574,575],"class_list":["post-2665","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-open-letters","tag-bad-ideas","tag-dandies","tag-garbage","tag-good-luck","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-GZ","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2626,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-brother-on-fathers-day\/","url_meta":{"origin":2665,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to her brother on Father\u2019s Day,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 16, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude, I have seen you do things that I don\u2019t know that I would have the inner strength, and the grace to do myself. I admire you for this. I hope you have the best of Father\u2019s Days.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In &quot;open letters&quot;","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3071,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/12\/in-an-open-letter-to-t-i\/","url_meta":{"origin":2665,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to T. I.,","author":"sherlonya","date":"December 13, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude, I don\u2019t even really listen to your genre, as you can tell both to my use of the word dude earlier in this sentence, and also \u00a0by my non-lyrical, non-ironic self-referencing sentence. However, I have to confess to you that \u2018Why You Wanna\u2019 is my current power song. This\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5024,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/04\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-truck-driver-who-drove-by-while-making-strong-direct-eye-contact-with-me-as-i-applied-my-chapstick\/","url_meta":{"origin":2665,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the truck driver who drove by while making strong, direct eye contact with me as I applied my chapstick,","author":"sherlonya","date":"April 16, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude. That felt weird.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4816,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2016\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-loud-man-in-a-suit-who-sat-in-his-seat-at-the-restaurant-with-his-legs-pretzeled-up-like-an-elementary-school-student\/","url_meta":{"origin":2665,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to the loud man in a suit who sat in his seat at the restaurant with his legs pretzeled up like an elementary school student,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 24, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude! Sir. Whatever. A rape joke? Seriously?\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2621,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-son-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":2665,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to her son,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 13, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude, today I heard you snapping as music played\u2026and let\u2019s just say this; it is intentional that I did not describe it as snapping to the music. How is this possible? You were weirdly early, sporadically. I never understand this in people. The beat is so audible, so predictable, so\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;open letters&quot;","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2952,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/10\/the-dude\/","url_meta":{"origin":2665,"position":5},"title":"The Dude","author":"admin","date":"October 19, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 Chester Alan Arthur never ran for president. One source describes him as being best known for succeeding\u00a0 James Garfield. Others might think he should be best known for his dapper style and his righteous facial hair. Burnsides! He had burnsides, a facial hairstyle named for Civil War General Ambrose\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;baking&quot;","block_context":{"text":"baking","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/baking\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"arthur1","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/headofstatecakes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/10\/arthur1.gif?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/headofstatecakes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/10\/arthur1.gif?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/headofstatecakes.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/10\/arthur1.gif?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2665","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2665"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2665\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2665"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2665"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2665"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}