“You know I love you, right? However, \u00a0you tire me out. That’s why you’re mostly pulled back into a bun. Now I feel like I’m blaming the victim. It’s just that I washed you well over an hour ago. Then I put rollers in you. Then I sat under a hair dryer and you’re still pretty darned wet. I hope the TSA doesn’t find out how much liquid you can hold, or else, I may never board another plane.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“You know I love you, right? However, you tire me out. That’s why you’re mostly pulled back into a bun. Now I feel like I’m blaming the victim. It’s just that I washed you well over an hour ago. Then I put rollers in you. Then I sat under a hair dryer and you’re still […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[331],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2748","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-Ik","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":3591,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/08\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-hood-dryer\/","url_meta":{"origin":2748,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to her hood dryer,","author":"admin","date":"August 22, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\"Really, right now you choose to die. I need to pick up Alex in about an hour and this hair isn't going to dry on it's own. I wish I had a hat large enough to cover these rollers....\"","rel":"","context":"In \"mishaps\"","block_context":{"text":"mishaps","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/mishaps\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1024,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2011\/02\/poetry-sunday\/","url_meta":{"origin":2748,"position":1},"title":"Poetry Sunday","author":"admin","date":"February 27, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"I am not about to sit here and say that each Sunday I'll be posting one of my poems here, but I do plan to do this every once and a while. Writing group folks, you've seen this one, but I have made some edits. Coiffure I had what I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "writing"","block_context":{"text":"writing","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/DSCN1971-1024x768.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2651,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-black-hair-care-manufacturers\/","url_meta":{"origin":2748,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to black hair care manufacturers,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 19, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI\u2019ve touched on this topic before, and I really think you\u2019re missing an opportunity. Here I sit smelling like\u2026well, I don\u2019t know what exactly I smell like, but it isn\u2019t good. The conditioner I put on my hair has me wanting to run away from my own head. I would\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2345,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/04\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-son-3\/","url_meta":{"origin":2748,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to her son,","author":"sherlonya","date":"April 21, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI swear you\u2019re going to thank me one day for this. I make sure that you do things around the house because I don\u2019t want to be responsible for turning a young man who is unable to take care of his basic needs loose in the world. When I give\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "parenthood"","block_context":{"text":"parenthood","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/parenthood\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1558,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2012\/02\/hair-story\/","url_meta":{"origin":2748,"position":4},"title":"Hair story","author":"admin","date":"February 22, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"I was the victim of a bad haircut. Not recently, but I still sting at that unfortunate event. I had decided to grow out my relaxer and went on a whim, during my lunch break to get the remainder of the relaxed hair cut off. Long story short, the person\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/02\/IMG_0789-224x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2402,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/04\/in-an-open-letter-to-bill-clinton\/","url_meta":{"origin":2748,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to Bill Clinton,","author":"sherlonya","date":"April 25, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYour hair always looks so cottony and nice. You get great haircuts. The way that your hair color has evolved is picture perfect. If you\u2019re getting some new version of a blue rinse, please don\u2019t ever tell us. Please let the dream live.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2748","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2748"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2748\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2811,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2748\/revisions\/2811"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2748"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2748"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2748"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}