“I know that everything isn’t for everybody, but I just have to say that I prefer euphemisms in my music to gritty and sometimes gross realism.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“I know that everything isn’t for everybody, but I just have to say that I prefer euphemisms in my music to gritty and sometimes gross realism.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[331],"tags":[625,626,627,189],"class_list":["post-2841","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-open-letters","tag-euphemisms","tag-explicit","tag-lyrics","tag-music","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-JP","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2443,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-daddy-yankee-pandora-station\/","url_meta":{"origin":2841,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to her Daddy Yankee Pandora station,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 3, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI regret to inform you that I can no longer listen to you at work. You see, there is something about this music that makes my hips move involuntarily. This is inappropriate at best and probably most likely creepy\/downright gross. Additionally, this music both makes me mouth lyrics (not a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3699,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/09\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-gross-granola-bars-i-bought-in-bulk-before-i-knew-they-were-gross\/","url_meta":{"origin":2841,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the gross granola bars I bought in bulk before I knew they were gross,","author":"sherlonya","date":"September 23, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cIt wasn\u2019t until I looked into my lunch bag to discover that, despite my remaining hunger, the bag was empty that I fully appreciated you. The good thing about you is that I certainly won\u2019t eat you when I don\u2019t absolutely need to, but when I do need a little\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3061,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/12\/in-an-open-letter-to-a-dream-involving-a-gross-bathroom\/","url_meta":{"origin":2841,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to a dream involving a gross bathroom,","author":"sherlonya","date":"December 12, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYou woke me up. I never again want to see a scene where the toilets are trashcans, there is wetness all over the floors, and the stalls are partitioned by well-worn shower curtains. Also, I don\u2019t want to see a hair salon situation in such a setting. Finally, since I\u2019m\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"dreams\"","block_context":{"text":"dreams","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/dreams\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4130,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/11\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-high-school-teacher-who-once-said-toasked-of-me-you-dont-do-that-lil-kim-stuff-do-you\/","url_meta":{"origin":2841,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to the high school teacher who once said to\/asked of me, \u201cYou don\u2019t do that Lil\u2019 Kim stuff, do you?\u201d","author":"sherlonya","date":"November 19, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cGross. I think that you were making an allusion to the rumor circulating during that time that Lil\u2019 Kim had her stomach pumped for, uh, let\u2019s just say, big girl reasons. But, I could be wrong; I\u2019ve never been great at putting together these sorts of things. What I do\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3023,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/11\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-middle-aged-man-with-the-nice-sporty-backback\/","url_meta":{"origin":2841,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to the middle aged man with the nice sporty backback,","author":"sherlonya","date":"November 27, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYou were the last person I expected to see stop to blow a snot rocket.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"gross\"","block_context":{"text":"gross","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/gross\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3728,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/10\/the-camelot\/","url_meta":{"origin":2841,"position":5},"title":"The Camelot","author":"admin","date":"October 2, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Everybody has something trite to say about our 35th President, John F. 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