“It was your moustache. It was so dark and rich. It reminded me of Barry White’s voice. It didn’t match your hair. I had questions. Those questions were what I was considering when you caught me in the act….”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“It was your moustache. It was so dark and rich. It reminded me of Barry White’s voice. It didn’t match your hair. I had questions. Those questions were what I was considering when you caught me in the act….” <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[428,764],"class_list":["post-2981","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-barry-white","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-M5","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2968,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/10\/in-an-open-letter-to-rutherford-b-hayes\/","url_meta":{"origin":2981,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to Rutherford B. Hayes,","author":"sherlonya","date":"October 1, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201c\u201dI have to confess that your beard has always reminded me of Shredded Wheat cereal. This reminds me of a man at the gym who\u2019s moustache makes me think of coarsely-ground coffee beans. President Hayes, on second thought, this might not be about you at all.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "obsessions"","block_context":{"text":"obsessions","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/obsessions\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4359,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2015\/02\/in-an-open-to-pandora\/","url_meta":{"origin":2981,"position":1},"title":"In an open to Pandora,","author":"sherlonya","date":"February 14, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYou know, I think I need my Barry White limited. Barry White unlimited, was just too much for me.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2538,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-bald-head-of-cabbage-that-lies-in-wait-in-the-fridge\/","url_meta":{"origin":2981,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the bald head of cabbage that lies in wait in the fridge,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 11, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cThe things I will do to you. You will feel like the star of a Barry White song. There will be creaminess and cheese, which is even better\u2026.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2401,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/04\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-with-the-morris-day-hair\/","url_meta":{"origin":2981,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to the man with the Morris Day hair,","author":"sherlonya","date":"April 25, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI couldn\u2019t help myself. Your hair caught my eye early this morning. I didn\u2019t want to be all obvious about getting a closer look. I\u2019m afraid that this made me behave in a creepy fashion, inching my car slowly forward and looking at you not by turning my head, but\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "hair"","block_context":{"text":"hair","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/hair\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4200,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/12\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-beers-sitting-nearby\/","url_meta":{"origin":2981,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to the beers sitting nearby,","author":"sherlonya","date":"December 22, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI am this close to singing Barry White songs to you. You see, my next work day is Friday which means it\u2019s on. I gonna love you, love you, love you\u2026..\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "beer"","block_context":{"text":"beer","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/beer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":152,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2009\/07\/brioche\/","url_meta":{"origin":2981,"position":5},"title":"Brioche","author":"admin","date":"July 3, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"BBA Challenge strikes again. This time, the bread is brioche. This sounds incredibly dense, but it didn't occur to me until I came across the blog French Laundry at Home that what I am doing is cooking, or in this case baking, my way from beginning to end of a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "cooking"","block_context":{"text":"cooking","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/cooking\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/07\/brioche-side-view-300x225.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2981","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2981"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2981\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2981"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2981"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2981"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}