“Dude, I don’t even really listen to your genre, as you can tell both to my use of the word dude earlier in this sentence, and also \u00a0by my non-lyrical, non-ironic self-referencing sentence. However, I have to confess to you that ‘Why You Wanna’ is my current power song. This is not to say that there aren’t parts of the song that I find utterly disgusting. There’s just something about the sound of it, and the sound of your voice. Thanks for this song. Now I am going to go make myself feel clean again by listening to some Hall and Oates….”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“Dude, I don’t even really listen to your genre, as you can tell both to my use of the word dude earlier in this sentence, and also \u00a0by my non-lyrical, non-ironic self-referencing sentence. However, I have to confess to you that ‘Why You Wanna’ is my current power song. This is not to say that […] <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764,344],"class_list":["post-3071","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","tag-rap","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-Nx","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":3210,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/01\/in-a-second-open-letter-to-her-son\/","url_meta":{"origin":3071,"position":0},"title":"In a second open letter to her son,","author":"sherlonya","date":"January 12, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude, you didn\u2019t think I\u2019d text your dad when you told me that you had a shower today. Thing is, if you tell me that you had a shower today and you tell me that you put on deodorant and your armpits smell somewhere between zesty and piquant, then something\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "parenthood"","block_context":{"text":"parenthood","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/parenthood\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2621,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-son-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":3071,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to her son,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 13, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude, today I heard you snapping as music played\u2026and let\u2019s just say this; it is intentional that I did not describe it as snapping to the music. How is this possible? You were weirdly early, sporadically. I never understand this in people. The beat is so audible, so predictable, so\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3801,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/10\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-son-whose-whips-are-looking-more-and-more-ahem-realistic\/","url_meta":{"origin":3071,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to her son whose whips are looking more and more *ahem* realistic,","author":"sherlonya","date":"October 16, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude, I love your creativity and your increasing attention on craftmanship. However, you have got to stop leaving the whips that you make in my passenger seat in the car. It makes me look crazy. It\u2019s not the possession of something that looks like it came from a fetish shop\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3225,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/01\/in-an-open-letter-to-a-pantene-commercial\/","url_meta":{"origin":3071,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to a Pantene commercial,","author":"sherlonya","date":"January 18, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cCommercials usually don\u2019t move me to buy products, however, if there is a song in it that involves both, \u2018it be hot like a desert, yo,\u2019 and \u2018she be walkin\u2019 like an animal,\u2019 it\u2019s likely that I\u2019m going to track the song down and maybe buy it.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2398,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/04\/maybe-a-potato\/","url_meta":{"origin":3071,"position":4},"title":"Maybe a Potato?","author":"sherlonya","date":"April 25, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"It started somewhat innocently. I was thinking about one of those articles that tells you what to wear, or what exercises to do based on your body type. I'm used to seeing apple, pear, and sometimes chili pepper as the options in these types of article...","rel":"","context":"In "Just Like a Pear"","block_context":{"text":"Just Like a Pear","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/just-like-a-pear\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3283,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/02\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-swimsuit-tried-on-in-anticipation-for-some-time-on-the-beach\/","url_meta":{"origin":3071,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to the swimsuit tried on in anticipation for some time on the beach,","author":"sherlonya","date":"February 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI expected you to look horrible on me, or for me to look horrible wearing you\u2026however you want to put it. However, you surprised me by looking horrible in totally unexpected ways. Way to keep it interesting. I have to confess, I\u2019m not even upset. 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