“It was the word Speedo that got my attention. However, it was the phrase ‘balls just a hangin’ that made me put my book down do that I could laugh fully and completely.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“It was the word Speedo that got my attention. However, it was the phrase ‘balls just a hangin’ that made me put my book down do that I could laugh fully and completely.” <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-3290","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-R4","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4315,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2015\/01\/in-an-open-letter-a-young-man-about-ten-years-my-junior\/","url_meta":{"origin":3290,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter a young man about ten years my junior,","author":"sherlonya","date":"January 26, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI couldn\u2019t hear all of the things that you said under your breath in order for me to hear them. I missed the first word, but the next few were, \u2018\u2026 and thick, and pretty, and cute.\u2019 I laughed, because I couldn\u2019t help it. You have braces. You may have\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3801,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/10\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-son-whose-whips-are-looking-more-and-more-ahem-realistic\/","url_meta":{"origin":3290,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to her son whose whips are looking more and more *ahem* realistic,","author":"sherlonya","date":"October 16, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude, I love your creativity and your increasing attention on craftmanship. However, you have got to stop leaving the whips that you make in my passenger seat in the car. It makes me look crazy. It\u2019s not the possession of something that looks like it came from a fetish shop\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2537,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-bicyclist-who-rode-while-exposing-a-good-three-inches-of-rear-end\/","url_meta":{"origin":3290,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the bicyclist who rode while exposing a good three inches of rear end,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 11, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cSir, it was the exposed buttock region that first got my attention. Then, however, I noticed that the crackside shadows made it look like you were wearing thong panties. So, of course, I had to get a closer look. I didn\u2019t see any underwear at all. This is, of course,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5395,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2021\/07\/when-lincoln-is-away\/","url_meta":{"origin":3290,"position":3},"title":"When Lincoln is Away","author":"sherlonya","date":"July 31, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Recently, the daycare changed its procedure, allowing parents into the building. As a result, they're no longer sending home information sheets about your child's day. They are, however, still doing the sheets and you can take a look at them. I've been saving the physical sheets because I love these\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "parenthood"","block_context":{"text":"parenthood","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/parenthood\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3385,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-tgifridays\/","url_meta":{"origin":3290,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to TGIFridays,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 11, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI would love to see your employee handbook, particularly the part about the uniform. I suspect to confirm that the phrase, \u201cpack it all in there\u201d is involved re: the pants\u2026.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4868,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/01\/savor\/","url_meta":{"origin":3290,"position":5},"title":"Savor","author":"admin","date":"January 1, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Someone recently asked me about my 2016. In the pause between processing the question and clumsily sputtering forth an answer, I realized that I have no idea what happened to 2016. This realization is what led me to 2017's word: savor. 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