“You thought this was going to be a nasty one, didn’t you. Actually, your vacuuming was liberating. Now, I’ll never again feel guilty when I hit the snooze button at 5:30 in the morning. We’re on different schedules and your bedtime vacuuming has illuminated that for me. Thanks!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“You thought this was going to be a nasty one, didn’t you. Actually, your vacuuming was liberating. Now, I’ll never again feel guilty when I hit the snooze button at 5:30 in the morning. We’re on different schedules and your bedtime vacuuming has illuminated that for me. Thanks!” <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-4039","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-139","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4452,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2015\/03\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-corpulent-man-with-an-oppressive-nose\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to the corpulent man with an oppressive nose,","author":"sherlonya","date":"March 10, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI have to admit that I enjoyed watching you being ignored as you tried to summon a cashier who was attending other customers by waving your hand weakly in her direction. I could wonder why you didn\u2019t hit the button on the self check that is to get store employee\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2969,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/11\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-who-wore-shorts-if-im-being-generous-underwear-if-im-being-true-to-my-heart\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the man who wore shorts if I\u2019m being generous, underwear if I\u2019m being true to my heart,","author":"sherlonya","date":"November 3, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI have been working on being judgy. It\u2019s a nasty habit of mine. When I saw you though, all sorts of alarms went off in my head. Especially after I saw you both in the Halloween store and in the craft store. My mama gut told me to keep my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"junk\"","block_context":{"text":"junk","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/junk\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2784,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/08\/in-an-open-letter-to-herself-at-three-in-the-morning\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to herself at three in the morning,","author":"sherlonya","date":"August 23, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cWe are by no means starving. Please do not wake me up again because you say we\u2019re hungry. Can\u2019t you convert some of our excess thigh meat into energy or something?\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2785,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/08\/in-an-open-letter-to-herself-at-three-in-the-morning\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to herself at three in the morning,","author":"sherlonya","date":"August 23, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cWe are by no means starving. Please do not wake me up again because you say we\u2019re hungry. Can\u2019t you convert some of our excess thigh meat into energy or something?\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2270,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/04\/smoothie-goal\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":4},"title":"Smoothie Goal","author":"admin","date":"April 18, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"One of my birthday goals this year was to try 26 smoothies. Sometimes, a gal just needs a project. And sometimes a gal has to do something to make sure that all of her projects aren't about cake. You see, the thing is that I love being in my warm\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/04\/20130411-210659.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5161,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/09\/in-an-open-letter-to-whomever-dropped-what-appeared-to-be-a-super-or-super-plus-tampon-in-the-parking-structure-a-few-months-ago\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to whomever dropped what appeared to be a super or super-plus tampon in the parking structure a few months ago,","author":"sherlonya","date":"September 23, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI still feel guilty for not saying anything. I got paralyzed. I didn\u2019t know what to say. You were at least a floor above me. 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