“You thought this was going to be a nasty one, didn’t you. Actually, your vacuuming was liberating. Now, I’ll never again feel guilty when I hit the snooze button at 5:30 in the morning. We’re on different schedules and your bedtime vacuuming has illuminated that for me. Thanks!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“You thought this was going to be a nasty one, didn’t you. Actually, your vacuuming was liberating. Now, I’ll never again feel guilty when I hit the snooze button at 5:30 in the morning. We’re on different schedules and your bedtime vacuuming has illuminated that for me. Thanks!” <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-4039","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-139","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4452,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2015\/03\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-corpulent-man-with-an-oppressive-nose\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to the corpulent man with an oppressive nose,","author":"sherlonya","date":"March 10, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI have to admit that I enjoyed watching you being ignored as you tried to summon a cashier who was attending other customers by waving your hand weakly in her direction. I could wonder why you didn\u2019t hit the button on the self check that is to get store employee\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2969,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/11\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-who-wore-shorts-if-im-being-generous-underwear-if-im-being-true-to-my-heart\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the man who wore shorts if I\u2019m being generous, underwear if I\u2019m being true to my heart,","author":"sherlonya","date":"November 3, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI have been working on being judgy. It\u2019s a nasty habit of mine. When I saw you though, all sorts of alarms went off in my head. Especially after I saw you both in the Halloween store and in the craft store. My mama gut told me to keep my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"junk\"","block_context":{"text":"junk","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/junk\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5161,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/09\/in-an-open-letter-to-whomever-dropped-what-appeared-to-be-a-super-or-super-plus-tampon-in-the-parking-structure-a-few-months-ago\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to whomever dropped what appeared to be a super or super-plus tampon in the parking structure a few months ago,","author":"sherlonya","date":"September 23, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI still feel guilty for not saying anything. I got paralyzed. I didn\u2019t know what to say. You were at least a floor above me. I hope that you had another one, or at least that were wearing black pants, or that you have someone at your job who slipped\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2270,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/04\/smoothie-goal\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":3},"title":"Smoothie Goal","author":"admin","date":"April 18, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"One of my birthday goals this year was to try 26 smoothies. Sometimes, a gal just needs a project. And sometimes a gal has to do something to make sure that all of her projects aren't about cake. You see, the thing is that I love being in my warm\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/04\/20130411-210659.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":3315,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/03\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-computer-that-turns-on-inconsistently\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to the computer that turns on inconsistently,","author":"sherlonya","date":"March 23, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI thought you ate my novel. I\u2019m glad that you didn\u2019t eat my novel. Thanks for the chance to back it up!\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "writing"","block_context":{"text":"writing","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5003,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/02\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-gentleman-who-diagnosed-the-problem-with-my-washing-machine\/","url_meta":{"origin":4039,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to the gentleman who diagnosed the problem with my washing machine,","author":"sherlonya","date":"February 14, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cHi! I\u2019m glad that you were able to tell me what the problem is. Thanks for that. I guess that I also appreciate your admiration of my president Pez dispensers. 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