“One glance and my mind went crazy. It looked like your underwear was pressing equally hard into your flesh as it was into the thin pants you wore. But it is the thought of the sweet, sweet relief that you must feel when you take those things off that captivated me. I wonder if you were punishing yourself on purpose in order to later feel that sudden burst of freedom….”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“One glance and my mind went crazy. It looked like your underwear was pressing equally hard into your flesh as it was into the thin pants you wore. But it is the thought of the sweet, sweet relief that you must feel when you take those things off that captivated me. I wonder if you […] <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-4392","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-18Q","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2969,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/11\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-who-wore-shorts-if-im-being-generous-underwear-if-im-being-true-to-my-heart\/","url_meta":{"origin":4392,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to the man who wore shorts if I\u2019m being generous, underwear if I\u2019m being true to my heart,","author":"sherlonya","date":"November 3, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI have been working on being judgy. It\u2019s a nasty habit of mine. When I saw you though, all sorts of alarms went off in my head. Especially after I saw you both in the Halloween store and in the craft store. My mama gut told me to keep my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"junk\"","block_context":{"text":"junk","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/junk\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4778,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2016\/06\/traffic-1\/","url_meta":{"origin":4392,"position":1},"title":"Traffic #1","author":"admin","date":"June 23, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Megan sat in her unreliable Plymouth Reliant in 85 degree, remind-you-of-a-moist-mouth, Michigan summer heat. Why is the universe mad at me this time? \u00a0She looked around, realizing that she was being dramatic again; to be stuck in traffic is to be stuck with the equally unlucky. \u00a0Revision: only someone who\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Traffic"","block_context":{"text":"Traffic","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/writing\/traffic\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"serialnovel","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/06\/serialnovel.gif?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2584,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-with-an-impressively-round-belly\/","url_meta":{"origin":4392,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the man with an impressively round belly,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 23, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI must confess it was the slice of skin made visible by the deficit between the bottom of your shirt and the top of your pants that first caught my eye. Then I noticed just how round your belly was. It was as if the gods scooped it from a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3917,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/10\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-middle-aged-woman-wearing-thin-stretch-pants\/","url_meta":{"origin":4392,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to the middle aged woman wearing thin stretch pants,","author":"sherlonya","date":"October 20, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cIt took me a minute to figure out what your backside reminded me of. It seemed so familiar and I couldn\u2019t place it until it came to me all at once. Calf liver!!\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5066,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-woman-walking-across-campus-with-a-confident-strut-and-the-comfortable-looking-pants\/","url_meta":{"origin":4392,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to the woman walking across campus with a confident strut and the comfortable looking pants,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 24, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cBravo. You look like you know how to live. Those pants looked so comfortable, yet stylish. I wonder if that\u2019s the secret to the bright bounce in your step. Your panties, however, did not look so comfortable. I wonder if that\u2019s the secret to the bright bounce in your step.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4495,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2015\/07\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-who-was-clearly-captivated-by-my-ample-bosom\/","url_meta":{"origin":4392,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to the man who was clearly captivated by my ample bosom,","author":"sherlonya","date":"July 3, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cSo, the thing is that if you openly stare at my breasts while descending the stairs, it makes it very hard for me to resist wanting to see you tumble down said stairs. I want to be better than that. 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