{"id":4471,"date":"2015-03-18T20:07:54","date_gmt":"2015-03-19T00:07:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/openletters\/?p=4706"},"modified":"2015-03-18T20:07:54","modified_gmt":"2015-03-19T00:07:54","slug":"in-an-open-letter-to-the-woman-whose-exposed-chestbreast-region-made-me-think-of-two-words-akimbo-and-splayed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2015\/03\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-woman-whose-exposed-chestbreast-region-made-me-think-of-two-words-akimbo-and-splayed\/","title":{"rendered":"In an open letter to the woman whose exposed chest\/breast region made me think of two words, \u201cakimbo\u201d and \u201csplayed,\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;It&#8217;s yo&#8217; thang. Do what you wanna do and all, but I couldn&#8217;t figure out whether that whole look you had going on was purposeful. Also, I just don&#8217;t understand the physics of the way your shirt sat.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;It&#8217;s yo&#8217; thang. Do what you wanna do and all, but I couldn&#8217;t figure out whether that whole look you had going on was purposeful. Also, I just don&#8217;t understand the physics of the way your shirt sat.&#8221; <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-4471","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-1a7","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2624,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-woman-in-stretchy-pants\/","url_meta":{"origin":4471,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to the woman in stretchy pants,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 15, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI simply did not understand the physics of your pants. They didn\u2019t appear to be shifting around. In fact, they seemed rather snug. The exception, though, was the crotch baggies. I just don\u2019t understand how your pants could be so tight, yet so loose. Is there a class on this\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;open letters&quot;","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3412,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/07\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-woman-wearing-the-short-sleeved-sweater\/","url_meta":{"origin":4471,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the woman wearing the short-sleeved sweater,","author":"sherlonya","date":"July 7, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cIt was probably about 6 weeks ago when I saw you. I don\u2019t know whether I was hypnotized, mesmerized, or generally confused. Short sleeved sweaters always confuse me. Yours threw in an additional twist because of the mohair-like texture. When I took a closer look, I saw that your sweater\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3917,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/10\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-middle-aged-woman-wearing-thin-stretch-pants\/","url_meta":{"origin":4471,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the middle aged woman wearing thin stretch pants,","author":"sherlonya","date":"October 20, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cIt took me a minute to figure out what your backside reminded me of. It seemed so familiar and I couldn\u2019t place it until it came to me all at once. Calf liver!!\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":65,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2009\/01\/65\/","url_meta":{"origin":4471,"position":3},"title":"Thinking, changing","author":"admin","date":"January 20, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Here I am on inauguration day thinking about everything but. It feels like I've decided not to go to a big party. I woke up last night several times with a racing mind. I've been thinking a lot recently about how you're always laying the foundation for something, whether you\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"goals\"","block_context":{"text":"goals","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/goals\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5059,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-friendly-man-who-sat-next-to-me-at-the-hall-and-oates-concert\/","url_meta":{"origin":4471,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to the friendly man who sat next to me at the Hall and Oates concert,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 18, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI suspect that the reason you started talking to me is because you felt bad that I was there by myself. It was a little weird how you kept leaning over though putting your upper side in contact with mine to tell me how much your wife was into the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3977,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/10\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-girl-in-the-thigh-highs-who-i-think-was-also-wearing-short-shorts\/","url_meta":{"origin":4471,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to the girl in the thigh highs who I think was also wearing short shorts,","author":"sherlonya","date":"October 31, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI didn\u2019t actually see any shorts, so I\u2019m being presumptuous here. I, however, am not being presumptuous when I\u2019m guessing that you were cold, very cold. But, it\u2019s your thing; do what you wanna do\u2026.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4471","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4471"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4471\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4471"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4471"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4471"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}