“If he sees your belly meat, he is going to tell me about it.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“If he sees your belly meat, he is going to tell me about it.” <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-4648","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-1cY","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":3292,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/02\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-with-the-impressively-round-belly\/","url_meta":{"origin":4648,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to the man with the impressively round belly,","author":"sherlonya","date":"February 20, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYour proud, round, sun-kissed belly reminds me of some rolls I made once. They were so warm, and buttery. They were fragrant and sweet, and they tasted like love. Now, my mouth is watering and I don\u2019t know how to feel about that\u2026.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4765,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2016\/06\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-woman-with-the-exposed-belly\/","url_meta":{"origin":4648,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the woman with the exposed belly,","author":"sherlonya","date":"June 5, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYour tummy looks like a ham hock.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "summer"","block_context":{"text":"summer","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/summer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2584,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-with-an-impressively-round-belly\/","url_meta":{"origin":4648,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the man with an impressively round belly,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 23, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI must confess it was the slice of skin made visible by the deficit between the bottom of your shirt and the top of your pants that first caught my eye. Then I noticed just how round your belly was. It was as if the gods scooped it from a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5132,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/08\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-with-the-watermelon-belly-seeded-not-seedless\/","url_meta":{"origin":4648,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to the man with the watermelon belly, seeded, not seedless,","author":"sherlonya","date":"August 4, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI did not appreciate that you grunted in disappointment when in response to an aggressive wind I held the hem of my dress. When your disapproving noise caught my attention, I looked at you to find you staring directly at my lap. I did not like that either\u2026.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3322,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/03\/in-an-open-letter-to-her-body\/","url_meta":{"origin":4648,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to her body,","author":"sherlonya","date":"March 28, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYou woke me up cause you\u2019re hungry? At two-o-clock in the morning? Couldn\u2019t you just have cannibalized some thigh meat or something? Not nice, body, not nice.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2784,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/08\/in-an-open-letter-to-herself-at-three-in-the-morning\/","url_meta":{"origin":4648,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to herself at three in the morning,","author":"sherlonya","date":"August 23, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cWe are by no means starving. Please do not wake me up again because you say we\u2019re hungry. Can\u2019t you convert some of our excess thigh meat into energy or something?\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4648","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4648"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4648\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4648"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4648"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4648"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}