{"id":4925,"date":"2017-01-04T16:31:37","date_gmt":"2017-01-04T21:31:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/openletters\/?p=4947"},"modified":"2017-01-04T16:31:37","modified_gmt":"2017-01-04T21:31:37","slug":"in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-in-the-fancy-bagel-shop-wearing-black-jeans-a-light-denim-jacket-with-a-prominent-leather-label-and-very-messy-and-swoopy-hair","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/01\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-in-the-fancy-bagel-shop-wearing-black-jeans-a-light-denim-jacket-with-a-prominent-leather-label-and-very-messy-and-swoopy-hair\/","title":{"rendered":"In an open letter to the man in the fancy bagel shop wearing black jeans, a light denim jacket with a prominent leather label, and very messy and swoopy hair,"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Bold choices, sir, bold choices. Way to do you, though. Way to do you.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Bold choices, sir, bold choices. Way to do you, though. Way to do you.&#8221; <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-4925","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-1hr","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":5480,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2021\/08\/in-an-open-to-the-very-bold-mystery-bruise-on-my-upper-thigh\/","url_meta":{"origin":4925,"position":0},"title":"In an open to the very bold mystery bruise on my upper thigh,","author":"sherlonya","date":"August 8, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI don\u2019t even know what caused you, but I don\u2019t like the way that you make my life look a little more adventurous than it really is.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2422,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-tanned-shirtless-silver-fox-i-saw-on-my-lunch-break\/","url_meta":{"origin":4925,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the tanned, shirtless silver fox I saw on my lunch break,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 1, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cSir, I have said this before, but I need to say it again; I am not used to this seasonal nudity. You, sir, almost caused me to walk right out into traffic with all your shirtlessness, and that tan, and those abs. You may just be a danger to innocent\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;open letters&quot;","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4063,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/11\/links-i-like-8\/","url_meta":{"origin":4925,"position":2},"title":"Links I Like","author":"admin","date":"November 16, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"I love that bold black and white photo on their wall. These cake pops are seriously cute! Chocolate. Bourbon. Pecan. Pie. Let the eggnog games begin. Pumpkin spice plus chickpeas? I'm intrigued. Now that I've forayed into donut making, it's more likely that I'll make these Pumpkin Creme Brulee Doughnuts.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;links!&quot;","block_context":{"text":"links!","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/links\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"linksilike","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/linksilike.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5026,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/04\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-the-senior-citizen-who-veered-off-of-his-path-to-get-a-better-look-at-my-butt\/","url_meta":{"origin":4925,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to the the senior citizen who veered off of his path to get a better look at my butt,","author":"sherlonya","date":"April 21, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cSir, my son told me all about that.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3624,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/09\/in-an-open-letter-to-phil-collins\/","url_meta":{"origin":4925,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to Phil Collins,","author":"sherlonya","date":"September 14, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYour music makes my heart swell with so many feelings. You, sir, transport me back to the longing of the adolescent years. Not the curiosity, that belongs to Prince, but the longing; you are the soundtrack to that awakening\u2026.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5306,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2019\/08\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-who-stared-at-my-chest-as-if-it-were-a-magic-eye-poster\/","url_meta":{"origin":4925,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to the man who stared at my chest as if it were a Magic Eye poster,","author":"sherlonya","date":"August 28, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cSir,\u00a0 you were pushing what appeared to be a very heavy cart. You put everyone\u2019s toes in jeopardy. Be better.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4925","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4925"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4925\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4925"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4925"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4925"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}