“I suspect that the reason you started talking to me is because you felt bad that I was there by myself. It was a little weird how you kept leaning over though putting your upper side in contact with mine to tell me how much your wife was into the concert, but that you were not. I couldn’t help but notice, however, how many of the song lyrics you knew. I also think that it was super weird that you asked me if I felt better after I came back from the bathroom.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“I suspect that the reason you started talking to me is because you felt bad that I was there by myself. It was a little weird how you kept leaning over though putting your upper side in contact with mine to tell me how much your wife was into the concert, but that you were […] <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-5059","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-1jB","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":5024,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/04\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-truck-driver-who-drove-by-while-making-strong-direct-eye-contact-with-me-as-i-applied-my-chapstick\/","url_meta":{"origin":5059,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to the truck driver who drove by while making strong, direct eye contact with me as I applied my chapstick,","author":"sherlonya","date":"April 16, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cDude. That felt weird.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3342,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-joe-biden-lookalike-she-saw-this-week\/","url_meta":{"origin":5059,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the Joe Biden lookalike she saw this week,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 21, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYou were driving behind me. I noticed you in my rear view mirror. As I stared at you, I think that you felt the heat of my gaze. I think it made you uncomfortable. That is the most sympathetic reason I can use to justify the way that you began\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2534,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-pregnant-woman-who-shimmied-and-squeezed-in-order-to-avoid-walking-the-long-way-to-the-elliptical-machine-next-to-mine\/","url_meta":{"origin":5059,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the pregnant woman who shimmied and squeezed in order to avoid walking the long way to the elliptical machine next to mine,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 11, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cMa\u2019am, I know that I am one of those people who can be weird about personal space, but next time you get on a gym machine directly next to someone else, you might not want to wear the perfume that makes the person next to you feel like she\u2019s tasting\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "open letters"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4597,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2015\/10\/big-breasts-and-a-memory\/","url_meta":{"origin":5059,"position":3},"title":"Big Breasts and a Memory","author":"admin","date":"October 21, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 Having recently moved, I find myself stumbling into memories as I try to determining how best to live in this space, and as I try to find a place for everything. Upon seeing a book from an African history I took in college in order to fulfill the non-Western,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "memories"","block_context":{"text":"memories","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/memories\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/image.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5073,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-saxophonist-from-the-hall-and-oates-concert\/","url_meta":{"origin":5059,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to the saxophonist from the Hall and Oates concert,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 27, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYou reminded me of both Bill Clinton and Dumbledore. This left me erotically confused.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5199,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/12\/2018-goals-a-look-backward-and-a-look-forward\/","url_meta":{"origin":5059,"position":5},"title":"2018 Goals: A Look Backward and a Look Forward","author":"admin","date":"December 31, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Over the last several days, I have been thinking about goals. I didn't set birthday goals this year because they were starting to feel almost arbitrary, like I was setting the goals out of habit. 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