“Sir,\u00a0 you were pushing what appeared to be a very heavy cart. You put everyone’s toes in jeopardy. Be better.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
“Sir,\u00a0 you were pushing what appeared to be a very heavy cart. You put everyone’s toes in jeopardy. Be better.” <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[764],"class_list":["post-5306","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-open-letters","entry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p33KTw-1nA","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2289,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/03\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-who-pulled-right-in-front-of-me-to-ensure-that-he-got-the-parking-spot-he-wanted-putting-my-toes-in-danger\/","url_meta":{"origin":5306,"position":0},"title":"In an open letter to the man who pulled right in front of me to ensure that he got the parking spot he wanted, putting my toes in danger,","author":"sherlonya","date":"March 14, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cYou, sir, are a jerk, and had I boy parts, I\u2019d have whipped out one of them and peed on your car. \u201c","rel":"","context":"In \"driving\"","block_context":{"text":"driving","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/driving\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3339,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2014\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-dad-who-wasnt-watching-his-kids-very-well-in-the-restaurant\/","url_meta":{"origin":5306,"position":1},"title":"In an open letter to the dad who wasn\u2019t watching his kids very well in the restaurant,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 1, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cIf you would have been paying closer attention, you would have seen your son digging deep between his flip-flopped toes. Wait\u2026now I understand\u2026you didn\u2019t want to see that. You, sir, are a pro\u2026.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4702,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2016\/03\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-woman-who-had-the-following-in-her-shopping-cart-cat-food-kitty-litter-chocolate-bunnies-bread-garlic-toast-and-corn-tortillas\/","url_meta":{"origin":5306,"position":2},"title":"In an open letter to the woman who had the following in her shopping cart: cat food, kitty litter, chocolate bunnies, bread, garlic toast, and corn tortillas,","author":"sherlonya","date":"March 8, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cPeeking in your cart brought joy to my heart.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5179,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/10\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-lady-who-reached-over-my-shopping-cart-in-the-store-in-order-to-start-putting-her-items-on-the-belt\/","url_meta":{"origin":5306,"position":3},"title":"In an open letter to the lady who reached over my shopping cart in the store in order to start putting her items on the belt,","author":"sherlonya","date":"October 1, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI sensed a little anger from you because I didn\u2019t move my shopping cart forward when you thought I should. However, your four-year-old\u2019s fingers were a couple inches away from the wheels of the cart, so I decided to, you know, spare his fingers. I\u2019m trying to be a better\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "parenthood"","block_context":{"text":"parenthood","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/category\/parenthood\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5004,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2017\/02\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-man-at-the-store-with-an-infant-in-his-shopping-cart\/","url_meta":{"origin":5306,"position":4},"title":"In an open letter to the man at the store with an infant in his shopping cart,","author":"sherlonya","date":"February 15, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cI bet your pre-baby body was slammin.'\u201d","rel":"","context":"In \"open letters\"","block_context":{"text":"open letters","link":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/tag\/open-letters\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2422,"url":"https:\/\/sherlonya.net\/blog\/2013\/05\/in-an-open-letter-to-the-tanned-shirtless-silver-fox-i-saw-on-my-lunch-break\/","url_meta":{"origin":5306,"position":5},"title":"In an open letter to the tanned, shirtless silver fox I saw on my lunch break,","author":"sherlonya","date":"May 1, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cSir, I have said this before, but I need to say it again; I am not used to this seasonal nudity. You, sir, almost caused me to walk right out into traffic with all your shirtlessness, and that tan, and those abs. 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