Open Letters:

From Me to Some of Everyone

Tag: sleeping

In an open letter to Lyndon Johnson,

“You are of great comfort to me in a lullaby sort of way. When I think I might have a hard time going to sleep, all I have to do is conjure you, and you’re there. Always. You are my blankie….”

In an open letter to the people who make garters,

“Do you all have a product for wild sleepers who manage to consistently lose their socks in the bed? Being active in your sleep doesn’t mean your feet don’t get cold. There’s a market out there for you; I’m sure of it.”

In an open letter to her brain,

“What WERE you dreaming about last night. My hair is in knots. Gentle combing from the ends ensues. Brain, could you lay off tonight?”