“Why? Just why? Next time I encounter someone like you I am going to just do what I wanted to do, choose another elliptical machine. Doing that and feeling like a jerk is better than becoming angry and tense because out of the eight or so elliptical machines you wanted the one right next to me. Also I wont have to see you lick your fingers in order to turn the pages on the communal magazines, nor will I have to watch you rip out the pages that you want to keep. Watching you repeatedly pull your work out pants from your frontal nether regions was unpleasant as well. The upside is that you scared me off of the elliptical machines and I visited the track instead….”