In an open letter to the woman who I watched wipe down a table at Panera,

“I am so confused by your logic. You see, you wiped the table down with a paper towel that was wet with water, and no cleanser. So, you didn’t clean anything, you just smeared whatever might have been on the table around. Then you left the paper towel on the table. Then you moved your muffin from the seat to the table. From the seat to the table? Finally, you went to get a bunch of those lemon wedges that are exposed to everyone as you left your food unattended.  Finally, you returned to eat with the hands you used to do this ‘cleaning.’ Help me make sense of this.”

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