“You woke me up. I never again want to see a scene where the toilets are trashcans, there is wetness all over the floors, and the stalls are partitioned by well-worn shower curtains. Also, I don’t want to see a hair salon situation in such a setting. Finally, since I’m no longer sleeping, those images […]
Tag: gross
In an open letter to the middle aged man with the nice sporty backback,
“You were the last person I expected to see stop to blow a snot rocket.”
In an open letter to public restrooms,
“You chill my soul. I quake in fear whenever we encounter each other. I know that you’re not supposed to sling around the words ‘always’ and ‘never’ in relationships, but ours has never been a healthy one. You always make me worry about my health. I am always concerned by all of those moist surfaces. […]
In an open letter to her wrong and uncouth mind,
“Why do you do this to me, fill me up with thoughts that are too strange to ever utter aloud? Why do you get started so early? At least this morning I was in the shower where I could metaphorically cleanse myself while I actually cleansed myself. Give a gal a break, would you?”